Lessons I've learned from the Ocean

  Mis seres queridos,
FELIZ DÍA DE INDEPENDENCIA!!! 🎇🎆🎉🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
Pues, fue ayer, pero de modo! No puedo creer que casi hace un año,
estaba en El Centro celebrando este día festivo ahí. Pienso que digo
"no puedo creer" en cada Coreo electrónico... Lo siento. Soy un
incrédula...jaja

So this week has been a lot of thinking and reminiscing. We have
unfortunately dropped most of our investigators, which has been sad
but good. We've now been dedicating our time to finding, finding,
finding. And it's been pretty fun! We have started using the Book of
Mormon more in our contacts, and it really is stronger than the sword!
The word of God, guys! It's true! We have made it a goal not to leave
to go out contacting without a Book of Mormon in our hand. Why go to
battle without a sword? Why go out preaching without the word?
Anyways, it has been fun and we have seen many miracles.

Hermana Short goes home in less than 2 weeks, and it has been pretty
hard on her adjusting to how much time she should spend on the work,
and how much on preparing to go home. I feel like God puts me with
people who need to be listened to. It is something I am good at, and
something I have learned to cherish. So we have had a few of what I
like to call, "talks about our missions," but they have always ended
well. Satan sure knows how to mess with theses heads of ours. But he
can't mess with our hearts as easy, so we don't go down without a
fight.

On Friday, we went to MLC, and they fed us Costa Vida Salads. Mmmmm,
so good! We talked a lot about the goals we had set as a mission and
how we can improve. I always seem to let Satan into my head in these
meetings and tell me what an awful missionary I am, and that I've
wasted all my mission being a terrible sac, but, I fought it off
again, and made goals for myself. I only have 6 weeks left. One
transfer. So why not? Why not give it my all? Why not talk to
everybody I come in contact with? What have I got to lose except for
regret?

As I sat pondering over my goals, and my purpose as a missionary, I
realized something. My mission is a covenant with God. As I exercise
my faith to repent and change and improve, and make and renew this
covenant with Him everyday, I will be able to receive the guidance of
the Holy Ghost, to direct me along the path that God needs me to go
on, and endure faithfully and willingly to the end.

The mission has a program they are using now called My Plan, which
helps returning missionaries set goals and make plans for themselves
and for the future. I started it today actually, but the biggest
revelation that I received for it came a week ago, as I sat pondering
on the edge of the ocean. Here I was the cliffs, where land and water
fought a tug-of-war daily. I looked out across the ocean to the
horizon line and just felt empty. And I felt sad that I felt empty.
Here I was staring out across one of God's greatest creations and I
should have been feeling wonder and awe. But I wasn't. But that word
"creation" hit me. I thought about how God separated the light from
the dark, the land...from the sea. Here I was weeks away from the end
of one creation to the beginning of another. The end of my mission,and
the beginning of my future. Suddenly, I recognized ships on the
harbor. And seagulls, and Pelicans. I saw the waves and could imagine
the sand dancing along with the wind. The ocean taught me a very
important lesson. "You create what you SEA." The future is mine. God
has created the material, and I will create a future out of them. The
question is, what are the materials? Much like Nephi, I need to build
a boat. I must ask, "whither shall I go that I may [insert deep life
question] that I may make [goals] to construct [my life] after the
manner which though hast shown unto me?" He has shown me the way, and
now all that is left is for me to create, construct, and sail upward
and onward across the next creation of my life.

I am grateful for my mission. The future is scary, and sometimes, we
don't know what to make of it, but I am grateful for the guidance of
the Holy Ghost, and the love from a Father in Heaven who knows what
he's doing, even when I don't. I have changed a lot, and I plan to
continue to change and to grow, to create. The Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter-day Saints, the Book of Mormon, Joseph Smith--it's all true.
I know it is, because it has made me who I am today, and will help me
become who I want to be tomorrow, and forever!

Con Amor,
Hna Howell