I feel inadequate...
Both verbally and vocally.
I have difficulty expressing myself in the way I want to. I worry that my inability to do such limits others from finding out who I really am...
But...
As I think this, I think about my purpose as a missionary.
"To Invite others to Come Unto Christ..."
The purpose is not for them to know me!
But, to know HIM.
Who He really is.
And, in reality, as they come to know me, I hope they will already have a glimpse into who He is, as I represent Him.
Even still, as they come to know Him, I hope they will get a glimpse at who I am. They will learn of His love, and His compassion. They will learn that He knows them. Perfectly. And as such, they will know that He knows me. Perfectly. And loves me as I am.
So...What need have I...to feel inadequate?
Christ is the Lord. It is He who I represent. And it is He who loves without thought of fault. I hope that as I open my mouth to speak of Him, words will flow. That hearts will be touched. And that mine will be one of them.
"Let the Holy Spirit guide.
Let His whispers govern truth.
He will testify of Christ.
Light our minds with Heaven's View."
Con muchas amor,
Hermanita Holly Howell
You are absolutely spot on. A mission was the most humbling experience I have ever had. Through spending 24/7 with a companion, learning a whole new skill set and constantly working to improve through daily study and weekly training, my flaws became painfully apparent. This is something that many Sisters -- I think all missionaries -- experience. With that humbleness, came a necessity to rely on the Lord more than ever before. That reliance on my Savior is how my mission changed me. Thank you for writing this. Good luck on your mission, Hermanita. I can see it will be an amazing experience, because you are already letting it change you for the better :)
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