Surprise. This is it. It's official. This is the moment where the truth comes out. My Mission Papers are In!! And I am so excited! There's a quote that says Your Future is as Bright as your Faith and I must say it is feeling very bright! It has taken me a lot of faith to get where I am today. My Heavenly Father and I have grown so much closer as I have learned to put my faith in Him in any and all instances. Even the little things, I know He plays such a big part in! He is very much involved in the details of our lives, and cares so much about us individually. I know this is true, because I have seen it so many times in my life, where He practically had to yell down at me, "I AM HERE!" before I've really heard and felt Him. And now it is not that hard to miss even His softest of whispers. It is hard; I'm human and I make mistakes; but He is my Father, and I know that I am loved by Him.That is truly what it is all about!
In my interview with both my Bishop and Stake President, I was asked the question, "Why do you want to serve a mission?"
I want to serve a mission because of Love. His Love. The Love that I have been feeling everyday since I first fully realized of the reality of a Loving, ever watchful and caring Heavenly Father. I felt fragments of this love for the people who I served down in Ecuador, the people passing on the streets and the workers and the children I worked with. It was addicting. It was desirable. It was peculiar. Most importantly, it was REAL. A real Christ-like love for a people I knew nothing about. A real desire to help them, to know them, to let them become a part of something better, a desire for them to know what I knew, before I even fully knew it myself.
I want to share that love with the people I serve in.... I don't have my call yet, but wherever I am sent, I know that I can trust in my Heavenly Father to know that is where I am needed at that exact particular moment in time. So much in my life has been leading up to this crucial, pivotal moment. I've often felt at times that I am needed for so much more then what I am doing at current. I have a good strong spirit inside me, and She knows who she is better than I do, and we both feel the pull to become better, to do better.
Things I am doing now in my life AREN'T "Bad." I go to singles ward, I spend time with my friends, and I work hard and make money to provide for my basic needs. These things are good. But I could be doing so much better, and it definitely isn't my Best. It's like the Good-Better-BEST talk by Dallin H. Oaks in conference. I have best-level potential. With my Father in Heaven and my Savior Jesus Christ, I can reach that potential as I put my faith in them.
I could be getting my call in a few days...or a few weeks!! But either way it is a test of faith on my part, and definitely a lot of patience. I am ready to stop focusing on myself, and instead on other people who the Lord sees fit to place in my path. I really am so excited! Very, very, very nervous, scared to death, but excited all the same. THIS IS IT!! A YEAR AND A HALF!!
Now, all I have to do is (patiently?!) Wait...
Lots and lots of love,
Future Sister Holly Howell
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